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Fariz Demiroski's avatar

Thanks for this, so many synchronicities I think God is having fun with me now and I’ve never felt so much joy and peace in my life. The passed couple days was learning and conceptualizing the SEC and it’s so strange it’s almost as if once I figure something out on my own, God confirms my suspicions in the most obvious ways and I feel so blessed for that. I know I’m on the right path. God bless you both!

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Veigo Tamra's avatar

Hello

My name is Veigo Tamra I am 39 year old and I am living in Estonia.

I have joined CTMU Facebook group years ago. Thank you for having me guys.

First of all I will apologize for my bad grammar and sentence build english and its grammar is not in my every day use.

I would like to share a story with you what bring me to CTMU and how I started to look this world bit differently. Please do not feel anyhow offended because my story contains use of drugs and alcohol.

It was year 2003 and I was 20 years old, weekends then where filled with parting with alcohol and sometimes also drugs.

Me and my friends drove a car to unfinished bridge construction site, that was near my hometown.

We parked our car in top of a hill where it was nice view to surroundings.

One of my friends offered me an ecstasy pill and I accepted it with joy. It was just another warm up for upcoming party for us. We where drinking easy beverages and there where also a joint of marihuana in the car. I remember taking only one puff of it because of bad experience on marihuana past times.

I was looking out of the side window to the empty black sky when suddenly I started to feel that I am losing my weight I started to feel less and less heavy to the point I felt nothing at all. I looked at my hands and they where not there. I raised my eyes to look out of the window again and I saw myself looking out of the window witch followed with crowing ball of light it was yellow light just like a little sun was glowing in the black sky.

I looked at this ball of light and I felt absolute bliss. The feeling of all the feelings . Feeling like I was in a mothers womb. I felt that we are all connected, I felt what I would say oneness with the universe I felt that I am part of everything and everything is a part of me. Suddenly all seemed so very clear to me, it was like someone or something was explaining the meaning of everything to me, in language that I understood but I could not explain this in languages we use. This experience lasted little time and my senses where again back in the car where I found myself screaming. My friends rattled me up asking what is wrong. I was dazzled and speechless for some time and then I started explained the very same thing to them what I am writing to you all.

Suddenly I was completely sober, my mind was so very sharp and I felt completely clear. I remember telling to the driver to take me home, as I left the car I took a look around the concrete block buildings in my hometown and my vision felt like it was ahead of the picture what my brain processed to me, it felt like I was in some sort of program that pictured me first frames and then details.

Next day everything was “normal” again but I will never forget what I saw seeing that ball of light what I described as a little sun explaining something to me, it is stuck in my head from that day on, I know it is there but I do not know language how to explain that.

So very often I found myself trying to explain that feeling to my friends my girlfriends etc.

Some years passed and I remember watching this movie called The Fountain with my girlfriend.

In the end of this movie there can be seen the main characters road to awe, this was the point when I shouted to my girlfriend THIS IS IT this is the closest thing what I saw in the sky.

I was startled how well directors of this movie could but oneness with the universe to the picture. But it was only picture…. the feeling of it was something else, something very special.

Now I have been wondering about that night a lot and I´ve come to conclusion that it all was a mix of alcohol and drugs that messed around with my brain and broke some kind of lock that gave me a glimpse access to this indescribable information.

I think the answers to all questions are already there in everyone´s mind, now we need to unlock them.

I have tried various types of meditation to get to this point again.. hell I´ve tried even same drugs in same place, but nothing seems to work until I´ve found lucid dreaming. I think that in our dreams we really have the free will.

Since early age I have seen very vivid dreams and I will always remember them with amazing detail, not until recent years I have come to master lucid dreaming and I have taken myself to this almost awe point many times. Every next time I fell to get closer but not quite there, because my mind is starting to play tricks like I know I am in sleep in my sleep, therefore I must go to deeper sleep, through this process I could experience many realities which some are as “real” we are right now. I call it the lowest point of subconsciousness.

Acknowledging my subconscious in that state allows me to access it thus asking the questions.

Now one must understand the question to the very basic level and ask it with language we all feel that is there, but do not know how to use it…

Now for the 2023 part Story you just read was written in 11 November 2018... but Hey thing do not change if you have been ascended once you will stay there. What I want to share is that numerous NDE`s I have had in my lifetime they all thought me something. Number one key from all that is that we can become and we can have everything that your mind is capable of thinking you just have to concentrate enough and it will be there... patience is the key. Also I would add that I was being religious until I had NDS after near death experience I realizsed that Bible was just a man made intsrument to control people. It was very clear to me in an instance... ask yourself " have I ever meet and Anarchist Christian" Probably no and that is because there are the ten commandments..... mhm you get me there. Being in this Fake world all these years listen and living this s*4h all over everyday. My opinion is is that Mr Langan is the real deal and do not question that!!!

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Dr. Gina Langan's avatar

Hi, Veigo - great to see you here! We're trying to get a Sunday meditation chat stream going at Youtube. Not enough people yet but when we get up to about 100 consistently, I'll invite Chris to pop in and take questions for a few minutes each week. I'll post a reminder each week. Hope all is well in your neck of the woods :)

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Anton Yevdokymov's avatar

It's inspiring to listen to such NDEs. I have a few stories to share and probably should've done it under Jan 10 post, but hope it's not an inconvenience.

My mother told me about her experience while being operated under narcosis; it was somewhat similar to Jacob's. She described it as "travelling though space with various dynamic lights of unspeakable beauty". Her operation was due to fatal car crash where her father, my grandfather, died in a driver seat. It was several years before my birth. She also told that when she was in a car shortly before the crash she was telepathically contacted by higher force that told her "There will be an accident. Who do you want to die?". She freaked out and mentally responded "Please, not me". It later brought a hard sense of guilt on her.

I've also experienced something similar to NDE. It would more properly be called partial retraction to source as I technically wasn't near death. Unfortunately it was induced by ingestion of psychedelics around a decade ago when I felt utterly lost in my life. The experience resembled throwing myself right into the mental battlefield. It was due to my specific life programming. I was raised in big family with Soviet serviceman grandfather and father who actively opposed Soviet rule. This rift was present from the earliest years of my life; it put me in position of hard choices and shaped my further life. (I want to clarify that I have no affiliation in politics besides voting, but was active as a citizen on a local level, e.g., lobbying renovation of our multiapartment building; protesting illegitimate constructions in vicinity, etc.) So the mental battlefield was all political, ripe with negative potentials (I'm describing my then not so informed impression here; of course there is a certain kind of balance between positive and negative in every moment) and felt like energy streams only aligned with certain political powers. Without much previous spiritual knowledge, acting from the position of pure intuition, it took me some time and effort to arrive at thought that contrary to present streams, I should try to find a way to release mental energy to regular people, to general population without any expectations (not as a favor, but as a way of choosing future). It was also a time when I was contemplating "paradoxes" of QM and picked one very nuanced false detrimental assumption about it that was later resolved by CTMU. Please bear in mind that this account is concise, undetailed, and misses highly complex but important interpersonal dynamics. Thank you for your attention.

(Edited to clarify few points)

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Jake Lowson's avatar

Anyway, someone once said to me that she knew someone who had an NDE and saw a white light at the end of a tunnel.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

Got called a freak today by someone who wants nothing to do with me anymore. On top of that, he got angry at me to the point that tears swelled up and he got all hostile. He’s in the danger zone IQ range so I’m not going to miss him. Fortunately my friend who I see is at genius level IQ (162) so he understood me and affirmed our friendship. Problem is that the other fellow is all sweetness and friendliness to him and I think why doesn’t he find him an affront (people in the 156+ range, the masses, including the professional classes find them an affront of some sort) and I was very much affronted today. Got to rise above the envy and hostility.

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Dr. Gina Langan's avatar

It's so hard to ignore these people but that's all you can do. Unfortunately, humans seem to be hardwired to "jockey for position". When we started to develop the teleologic living program in earnest three years ago, I'm just not going to deal with people that don't align with teleology. Unfortunately, if you are still working in the (un)real world, we have to deal with these types every day. When you look at him, just thank God that you are operating at a higher frequency.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

Since the real universe contains all and only that which is real how can I be in the (un)real world, is that which you call “(un)real” just reality, albeit perhaps earlier reality rather than unreality, please explain your concepts.

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Dr. Gina Langan's avatar

Reality is, in fact, decohering (IMHO). There is no such thing as consensus reality anymore. It's splitting apart and will result in the collapse of society as the gaps widen.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

And I’m trying to bridge that gap

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Jake Lowson's avatar

Have we not had enough sickness and crisis already? Are we not in fact approaching the end point not leading to death or destruction, on the contrary, to healing ❤️

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Dr. Gina Langan's avatar

Correct. But that will be after the collapse, other "events", and a lot more sickness and death, unfortunately. It is something to look forward to when we finally attain the human singularity.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

And my sickness is not an individual eccentricity, it is a sickness of our times.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

The sickness itself has a curative effect.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

I’d really like to experience now a little bit of what the human singularity will be like when it happens, just some small portion so as to get an idea of the whole, can you put it all into words, the power of positive thinking and all?

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Jake Lowson's avatar

One final piece before I bore you to death, yet I feel compelled to share it because so far no one has fully understood why I am so appreciative of Hermann Hesse’s Steppenwolf (for madmen only might be why there is such a lack of understanding but then again I am doing this for my own understanding too, not that I’m mad and not sane but then you have to understand that too! Ha. Ha) the quote runs

“I can see that Haller’s sickness of mind is no individual eccentricity, but the sickness of our times themselves, the neurosis of that generation to which Haller belongs. Nor does it by any means appear to afflict only those individuals who are weak or inferior, but precisely those who are strong, the most intelligent and most gifted. It makes no difference how much or how little they are based on real life, these notebooks are an attempt to overcome the great sickness of our times, not by evading or glossing over the issue, but by seeking to make the sickness itself the object portrayed. They signify, quite literally, a journey through hell; a sometimes anxious, sometimes brave journey through the chaos of a mind in darkness. But the journey is undertaken with a strong determination to traverse this hell, to face up to the chaos and to endure the bad times to the limit. The key to my understanding was provided by some remarks of Haller. Once, when we had been discussing so-called acts of cruelty in the Middle Ages, he said to me: ‘What we think of as acts of cruelty are in reality nothing of the kind. Someone from the Middle Ages would still find the whole style of our present-day life abhorrent, but cruel, horrifying and barbaric in a quite different way. Every age, every culture, every ethos and tradition has a style of its own, has the varieties of gentleness and harshness, of beauty and cruelty that are appropriate to it. Each age will take certain kinds of suffering for granted, will patiently accept certain wrongs. Human life becomes a real hell of suffering only when two ages, two cultures and religions overlap. Required to live in the Middle Ages, someone from the Graeco-Roman period would have died a wretched death by suffocation, just as a savage inevitably would in the midst our civilization. Now, there are times when a whole generation gets caught to such an extent between two eras, two styles of life, that nothing comes naturally to it since it has lost all sense of morality, security and innocence. A man of Nietzsche’s mettle had to endure our present misery more than a generation in advance. Today, thousands are enduring what he had to suffer alone and without being understood.’ Often, when reading Haller’s notebooks, I couldn’t help thinking of these words. For Haller is one of those people who end up caught between two eras, deprived of all security and innocence; one of those fated to experience to an intense degree, as a personal torment and hell, all that is questionable about human life. That, it seems to me, explains the significance his notebooks may have for us, and it is why I resolved to make them public. Beyond that I wish neither to defend nor pass judgement on them. That is something for each individual reader to decide according to his or her conscience.

So you may be able to understand there is method in madness.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

I like what you say Genie, I have my own teleological system that probably relates to the teleological living program, from what I know about TLP it actually does and adds extra structure to my own system like the importance of detoxing, IF and cardio exercise (not just muscle building). It seems I have a choice here, be like you and refuse to be around those who don’t align with teleology, or compromise. Now, I’ve never been one for compromise so I choose to be like you. I’ll tell my friend he can still hang out with me yet I won’t be also hanging around when the other is about. How’s that sound? More real?

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Jake Lowson's avatar

Genie, when you say “people that don’t align with teleology” are you referring to this man? Also, he will cling to my other friend yet my other friend wants to be friends with both of us. I didn’t actually see him today because I knew the other would be there. There is such a thing as elevating one’s society in the theory of positive disintegration (a level four feature) so given the 30 point tolerance of iq level I’m not just going to be friends with someone who doesn’t fit that category naturally it will end in intolerance. I just have to find a way to see my other friend somehow/somewhere without seeing him. So believe me I’m not living an unreal life would never let myself!

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Dr. Gina Langan's avatar

A lot of people who have never heard of the CTMU, live a teleological lifestyle. They have either found the path through their religion, resonated with it, and maintained (or came back to it). Others just intuit it because reality is teleologic and when one follows a teleologic way of life (regardless of his or her knowledge of the CTMU, or even Jesus). Some just call it karma and try to do the right thing.

I'm extremely happy that more people are getting on the right track. They will resonate with the CTMU when they stumble upon it and will be able to appreciate its importance. That is an important aspect of why we created the program in the first place. People who are already walking the path are "CTMU-ready". The others are either NPCs or demonically posessed (to one extent or the other). That person you described has opened his heart to demonic transference by not leading a teleologic life. I've seen it happen to friends, family, and acquaintences. I cut these people out of my life until they can at least make an effort. They just don't play by the same rules and are therefore dangerous.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

Thank you, Genie. 👍🏻

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Jake Lowson's avatar

Just to clarify, he said the way I look at him is freaky, so he ignores me now.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

“The 135 IQ individual dislikes and fears the 150+ individuals” https://crisisofthemodernworld.wordpress.com/2018/02/04/why-inappropriate-exclusion-at-150-sd-15/

I think that because 156-172 IQ is close “enough to the smarter keepers to allow for some communication and influence” (thank you Garth Zietsman for this information) it just hasn’t hit home with them yet...

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Dr. Gina Langan's avatar

It would be hard for me to resist just staring daggers at him, but I am really trying to practice what I preach and take the teleologic route. I try to feel compassion and not passively-aggress these poor souls. It's great he has taken the "ignore you" stance. Sometimes, that's the best we can get and it's not bad.

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Jake Lowson's avatar

I too will take the teleological route

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